Sunday, March 17, 2013

Chronicles Of A Married Life - IV

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote an article for 21 Fools, about the fun side of being married. As soon as it went wire, while people who know me were a bit surprised and me writing on these lines, but the target audience being the single/dating/newly married youth the real surprise was that it got a huge number of hits and shares. 

Nevertheless, I am not writing this to blow my own trumpet. What I really want to talk about, came from some of the comments left by the readers. Now these readers are unmarried, mind it. Yet, they seemed to be disoriented by the idea of marriage. I am not surprised, as so was I, until I took the step. Which is why I had decided I won't marry young and I shall marry only when I feel I am ready. Which I did. For one, this factor is very important to be able to smell the roses, yet be married. To do it when you are ready for it and not when your parents think you are. Families need to understand this more than the bride or the groom.

I really wanted to say something very sensible to these readers who seemed disoriented about being married. But, how do I, it's not like I have been peacefully married for decades, yet. Also, to be frank, I was short of the right words. Just then, a friend wrote about exactly what I had in mind, and dedicated it to S and me on our anniversary earlier this month. He named the post Love Actually.

If you are a young person who has witnessed the wrong sides of marriage around you, please don't let that affect how you live your own marriage. If you are reading this, I'l tell you what I have learnt.

  • No two relationships are the same. 
  • If you see a seemingly nice relationship, it doesn't mean your friend is lucky to have found such a nice partner. Most often than not, it's both who are lucky and luck is the fact that they put in a lot of hard work to keep each other happy.
  • There are more fights and arguments in a marriage than in any other relationship, probably. Accept it and end it before your day ends. Accept your fault, keep the ego out!
  • If you both want to make it work, work it will. Simple :-)
[Read what else my friends and I have to say about marriage here.]

4 comments:

  1. Totally agree with ur last line. Both the parties have to make it work, if they share some affinity. Nothing starts perfect. It has to be polished & worked upon.

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  2. As long as there is no third person involved it is possible to iron out the issues..successful marriages r those who understand to compromise every situationl and seek peace n happiness

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  3. Hard work hard work hard work.. definitely agree with that. Went and read your earlier post too, must show hubby - I seem to have skipped that foot rub aspect in the last 13 years :P.

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  4. True said , having found the right guy is the beginning. It takes a lot to make it work and to turn into marriage. Being in this phase I can just say, the fight is worth the love two people give to each other.

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