Saturday, September 22, 2012

Love Thy Stranger

Earlier this month, I was wishing a friend, R, on her birthday, when she said, "Dii, I am in that phase of life where people I have never met understand me better and I connect with them better. I don't understand how that works, and if it is right, but that's how it is and it makes me happy."


R is probably confused with the emotions going through her for complete strangers, but if you are a close part of my life, and you know how S and I met, you know how much I trust strangers, over people I already know! If you know me, you would also know, I have trust issues. 

So, I have trust issues, but I trust strangers! 

Nope, I am as sane as they come, probably saner than you are. 

I rely heavily on common sense, vibes and a very strong sixth sense. I believe in humanity too. And, I also believe in testing waters before jumping. But, what works for me, won't work for you. Of my closest friends, the last one I made from people I met was in junior college, when I was all of 15. Since then, none of the friends I made, made to a permanent place in my life. Does that say a lot about me, or about the people I met and befriended? Your take! :-)

Yes, the cyber space is unsafe. Very much so. It's easy to believe and get duped, when the only way you interact is via typed words. But I say, someone I have known all my life can dupe equally easily.

I fell in love with my husband when he was a stranger and after 6 years of knowing him and 3 years of being his wife, I can safely say he is the most secure branch of my life, almost as secure as my own parents. Samir and Abhishek, two friends I made more than a decade ago, are two of my closest friends. My real life best friends date back to almost two decades ago, and while they are irreplaceable, I haven't regretted being so close to Sam and Shake one bit!

Over the last 9 months, I made more such friends. About 15 odd. 1 ended up as family, the rest, very very close. These people have nothing to gain, and I have nothing to give them. But probably, we know each other better than a lot many people who've known us for years do. It's easier to discuss and share your sorrows, fears, and joys, when you know the other person is not judging you. The transition from being strangers to real life friends is different - here you know the real person before you are a part of their real lives. You understand them better.

It's when you love people who have nothing to give you and are asking for nothing in return, do you realise what love is. The feeling is so strong, it's not a joke. You miss each other everyday, and notice immediately when the other person is going through a phase.

Friendship is sweet. This is probably, the sweetest form of friendship.

Yes, it's advisable to go out, meet your real life friends, party, get laid and have fun ... but the level at which people who only talk to you connect, at times, people around you don't. 

11 comments:

  1. I think you just summed up the whole idea of Real friends v/s virtual friends and that too in a very simple way. I feel touched :) Thank you for writing it... A friend is one who spend time with you.. Chahe woh Online ho yaa offline :)

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    1. :-D true...friend is the one who spends time with you, more when you are low, than when you are high!

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  2. Virtual world has given me so much...much more than I can imagine.. i have been active online for the last 6 years... started with yahoo chat, blog, then now Twitter! I met someone with whom I had a relationship for 7 years.. I have friends, i have an elder sister (you) and all these relationships have just given me so much, i guess i value my virtual relationships as much as the real ones...

    Need i say I loved your post! :D

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  3. Like you met me and we decided to elope even though Sautan was around! You trust me because you know I won't take unfair advantage of you ^_^ I love you :*

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  4. This is so touching. Lovely post Sam :)

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    1. Thanks Yatin, it's been about 9 months I've known you guys and it only gets better. :-)

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    2. Yay and Long live hum logo ki dosti :)

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  5. I wanted to be one. But you blocked me and called me a stalker..hehe ..anyways I am still stalking your blog since you write well. And I couldnt resist commenting on this. Unlike a stalker :P

    God Bless

    Sia

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    1. I called you a stalker? Did I? Knowing perfectly that you are not comfortable with virtual friendships? :-) I have my reason and this is def not it, Sia.
      I stalk your blog to, coz what's good is good..one can't deny that. I specially liked the doodles. Take care :-)

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